accidental video;

[expunger]

[The first thing to come through is a horrible electronic feedback screeching from everyone's PCD; the video flickers and statics and coughs into life in fits and starts, with the picture scrambled for a few long seconds. The sound of sparks and distant sizzling can be heard.

Raphael's usual tight-laced demeanor doesn't come to her naturally these days: since Lucifer gutted her and filled her with Hellfire, she meditates for upwards of eight hours every day just to keep the darkness and destructive urges at bay. She has to put a remarkable amount of energy just into not burning the city down without being able to stop herself. But that ironclad self-control and need to protect aren't home anymore- Raphael doesn't have a fuck left to give, simply put. Her only reasons to behave herself are named Michael and Gabriel: one of them is a hollow, horrific shell of the brother she loves and the other- the other, her big brother, her Michael, the North her compass points to, put a fist through her face and called her a monster.

So when the video image finally focuses, it's no wonder that the lights are sparking, flickering, that electronics are screaming. Anything tying her to angelic urges is gone and the irresistible pull of that destructive Fire inside her, the ever-present searing fucking agony threatening to make her a monster, is undoing even her basic ability to keep her angelic aura in check. The Fire is too strong to keep out- lava-pattern burning like glowing embers is spreading from where her hands grip the table, mottling over the walls, here and there, present then gone, a physical representation of the Hell corroding her.

She's half in frame when the PCD turns on, hands braced against a table, hunching over with head bowed low. The angel looks different: her business suit is nowhere in sight, in favor of jean shorts and a tank top, with Castiel's Grace swinging gently from her neck. There's a few short seconds where she seems to be concentrating very hard on something. A few times a minute a wave of heat will distort the PCD's view like a desert mirage. After a particularly loud burst of sparks from the lights she looks up, sees the PCD on, and laughs like someone just made her day. Her face is bruised and beaten; she's clearly lost a fight.]

It finally turned on. I thought it might eventually. [She laughs again and shakes her head. Get the cobwebs out.] These damn angel auras are so hard to keep in check sometimes.

[Pushing off from the table and running a hand through her hair casually. She's moving stiffly. When she has something else to focus on, the Fire is almost soothing: like a constant drum-beat, keeping her smiling.]

Oh! [Folding her hands and pointing to the PCD with her steepled fingers.] I do have one request.

Would those good people still keeping the faith and praying here kindly hang up the white courtesy phone? Honestly. I, personally, could do with a tall glass of shut the fuck up now and again.

[Laughing now] I don't understand why you still bother. Earth to McFly -- [spinning around dramatically with her arms out wide] HE'S NOT LISTENING.

Why waste your time with Hail Marys and Hosannas when we have terrible lives to lead? For some of us, this is the afterlife. [Pointing at the PCD with a 'gotcha' expression, creepily reminiscent of Lucifer- or Uriel.] Stop waiting by the phone for someone who is not going to call you. It's hardly emotionally healthy.

[With a snap of her fingers the fluorescents stay on and stop buzzing, the distant appliances quiet.]

Maybe we should all stop throwing tantrums and crying for our mommies. Get busy doing something, right? That sure as shit isn't living and the Animus won't let us die.

[A simple smile. It looks convincingly happy.] Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go figure out how to turn this -- [indicating Castiel's Grace] -- into earrings safely.

[The video goes dead with a snap.]

Comments

[Video]

[wingsandwill.livejournal.com]

You seem stressed.

[Just making an observation~ Also the idea that she really does want to wear his grace as jewelry should be incredibly upsetting to him, but it isn't. He just doesn't care.]

[Video]

[expunger]

On the contrary, Cassandra. I am putting infinitely less pressure on myself than ever before.

[Video]

[wingsandwill.livejournal.com]

By making yourself earrings?

I hope they're hypoallergenic.

[Video] 1/3

[somethingspecial]

[Video]

[somethingspecial]

[Video] 3/4 actually

[somethingspecial]

[And, suddenly, the 5'3'' Rachel Berry fucking snaps.]

Do you happen to know what I have been praying for this entire week? For everyone to come to their senses so no one gets hurt! Including you! And I am sick and tired of everyone acting like an idiot every week and then just brushing it off the week after, you are a damn archangel, you should act like it!

[Video]

[somethingspecial]

[And then, Rachel Berry draws herself up, and through clenched teeth:]

Dear Father in Heaven, I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive the idiots acting like fools within Adstringendum. I'm certain come Sunday, they will all regret their actions, and they will need your guidance to set themselves straight.

Amen.

[And she cuts the feed.]

[offline]

[expunger]

[And that'll be one honey badger archangel rudely interrupting your dog walk, Rachel.]

You confuse me, Rachel.

[Video]

[fairymicrowaver.livejournal.com]

And one of you finally says it to the masses instead of swift genocide. Not that I actually care anymore. I used to. Used to break myself to pieces trying to save it all and keep from killing my brother. You all have no idea how close to the end game you nearly got me. I was going to take in your general and do it all. End it, the way you wanted it.

But I don't care anymore. Not about them, not about this, not about Sam.
[He has to resist a laugh because it all so funny to him. It won't be after this is over, when he's staring at his face in the mirror in the morning and hating it.

Self-loathing is a Winchester trait. It's something he understands. He's been so wrapped up in worry about Sam, about Castiel, about Jo, and trying to keep things alright that he couldn't even see what the angels were doing. He'd managed to watch and keep an eye on them before - and he failed.

This will last a view long time in his head, sitting like a tidy little nest egg of ideas and concepts that he will mull over as he really pushes his hunter self to the limits to seek answers.

But, right now he's cold. He's unfeeling and the only real thing he's doing is breathing.]

I got shown a version of the future before, you might remember this one. The Castiel of that time said, "Bang a few gongs before the lights go out." Sounds like the best advice I've ever gotten, what about you?

[Video]

[expunger]

[She laughs in delight] I remember that one.

Zachariah had a flair for the dramatic. That stunt got him sidelined from the garrison. It was supposed to scare you straight, not scare you into Sam's arms.

[Video]

[fairymicrowaver.livejournal.com]

When if he'd killed me and let me find Joshua sooner, you'd have your paradise. Funny how that works.

[Video]

[capuletnomore]

Lady Raphael....

[Whatever this event has done, it has turned the archangel into something frightening. For her to say such things about the Lord sends chills through Juliet. It has taken her most of the week to realize there is something affecting them all, herself included, but she'd thought that surely the angels would be immune to the tricks of the Animus.]

What you say, it cannot be true. You yourself have encouraged prayer before today. You have bade me recite it for you - the Nicene Creed. You would not have done this were your words today true. The Animus have harmed you, Lady.

[And now she scowls.]

Would that I could make them suffer for such a horrible deed.

[Video]

[expunger]

Juliet. [A little admiringly.] Look at you. There's more fire in your belly than I've ever seen- I saw you standing up for someone earlier this week.

Standing for something, not in shadows of someone who doesn't care.

It's magnificent.

[Video]

[capuletnomore]

I will always stand up for those whom I consider friends or worthy of my respect, Lady Raphael. Were someone to say such horrible things about you, I would tell them the very same. Hence, why I wish I could hurt the Animus, because they have hurt you.

[She isn't convinced that God doesn't care; she only wishes her faith could break the archangel free from the Animus' tricks.]

{Video}

[thewinterdoe.livejournal.com]

I've tried. {Lily's voice is lower than usual and she doesn't look completely put together.} Everything I touch goes wrong today.

{Video}

[expunger]

So don't touch anything. Try something new.

{Video}

[thewinterdoe.livejournal.com]

I could try sitting in a field, but that's hardly helpful.

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Didn't Daddy ever tell you not to play with your brothers' unmentionable bits?

[It would be endearingly cute and snarky if he didn't sound so withering, so utterly tired of Raphael's brand of whining.]

[expunger]

Why does everything with us have to come back to incest?

[painhumbles.livejournal.com]

Because no one believes we're all really related. They expect us to pair off like a alternate lifestyle Cullen family.

[Offline unless that's not allowed :| ]

[thelightbringer]

Well. You've finally become one of us.

[Offline] it's allowed but takes place before hair braiding. 8|

[expunger]

[Look who looks all the worse for wear.]

All it took was a little brain rape.

[Video]

[nexmosnonlucror.livejournal.com]

[Tom is peering at Raphael. There is an odd light in his eyes -- something different, more alive, more -- human than before. He is outside, enjoying the sunshine, feeling --

-- feeling happy.

And curious.]

Raphael.

[Calmly, curiously.]

May I ask a question of you?

[Video]

[expunger]

[Guess who's snapped out of it, punk?]

You may ask.

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